Hang Out Time! Craft the Perfect Invitation to Get Together
Asking new people to hang out can be daunting, but with the right approach, it doesn’t have to be awkward. As an experienced communicator, here are some tips I’ve learned over the years to smoothly and effectively invite someone new to spend time together.
Start with casual conversation
One of the keys to getting comfortable enough to extend an invitation is building up a little rapport first through low-pressure interaction. Look for opportunities to break the ice with light, low-stakes conversation – commenting on the weather, mentioning a shared class or activity you’re both a part of and asking an open-ended question. Keep it casual and don’t feel obligated to chat for long. A brief interaction here and there helps the other person get to know you as a person before you ask them to make plans.
Show legitimate shared interests
When chatting, try to find common ground by bringing up topics you’re both genuinely interested in. Ask follow-up questions to learn more about their interests and look for chances to relate experiences of your own. People are more receptive to invitations from those they feel understand them. Avoid fake, surface-level talk – be authentic in demonstrating overlapping hobbies, values, or experiences you can bond over. This lays the foundation for an invitation that’s based on mutual liking rather than obligation.
Gauge mutual enjoyment of past conversations
Pay attention to how the other person responds when you talk. Do they seem engaged and ask you questions too? Or do they give short answers and change the subject quickly? These nonverbal signals will give you a sense of whether they enjoy chatting with you or if inviting them to officially hang out might be pushing boundaries. There’s no shame in keeping things casual acquaintances if the interest doesn’t seem mutual. Not every new person you meet has to become a close friend!
Wait for an optimal context
The timing and setting of your invite matters too. Ideally, look for a moment when a shared interest or activity has just been brought up in conversation. For example, after discussing a sporting event you both watched, you could say “Hey, a few friends and I are catching the game this weekend – you should come join if you’re free!” Context helps the invitation feel natural and connected to things you’ve both shown interest in already.
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Keep the invitation low-key pressure
When extending the invite, make it very low pressure by avoiding words like “we have to” or phrasing it as a demand on their time. Something like “I’m grabbing coffee later, want to join?” Leaves the decision completely up to them without any pressure. You can also give them an out by saying “No pressure if you’ve got other plans, just thought I’d extend the offer.” Making it very low commitment takes away any social awkwardness that might prevent them from accepting or declining comfortably.
Accept a “no” with grace
Even the best invitation can be turned down, and that’s okay! If they politely decline, don’t take it personally or pressure them further. You can respond with an understanding tone like “No worries, let me know if you want to meet up another time” and change the subject. Leaving the door open means they’ll feel comfortable continuing casual conversation without awkwardness from a rejected invite. With patience and understanding on both sides, you can stay acquaintances even if a specific activity doesn’t work out.
Follow up politely if/when plans are made
If they do agree to hang out, follow up with a simple confirmation message closer to the date/time reiterating plans. And of course, follow through by being on time, attentive to their comfort level, and looking for opportunities to include them in low-pressure interaction with your other friends too if it’s a group setting. Positive experiences will encourage budding a new casual friendship over time through low-pressure invitations and quality time together.
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Conclusion
To summarize, when looking to transition an acquaintance into someone you casually hang out with, focus on building rapport, finding shared interests, inviting at an appropriate moment low-pressure manner, and being understanding. With patience and by making the other person feel seen as an individual you genuinely enjoy chatting with, those initial barriers to a new social connection can fall away naturally. While it may take some invitations before plans align, small consistent efforts often pay off in expanded social circles and quality time with cool new people.
FAQs
Q1. What if they seem uncomfortable when you try talking to them?
Politely excuse yourself and don’t force conversation if they’re sending signals they’d like space. Give them time and look for situations where they initiate chat first to build comfort.
Q2. How long should you wait before asking them to hang out?
There’s no set rule but aim for 2-3 low-key interactions like brief, casual chatting where you both seem engaged and enjoy each other’s company before extending a specific invitation.
Q3. How can I tell if they’re just being nice or want to hang out?
Pay attention to enthusiasm in responses, eye contact, and questions they ask you too – these nonverbal cues will reveal true interest levels. If responses stay short and they avoid follow-up invites, take the hint gracefully.
Q4. What kinds of low-key activities are good for a first invite?
Low-commitment group hangs like free outdoor events, casual coffee/drinks, and relaxed activities you’re both into. Keep pressure very low so they can say yes without a deep commitment of time/energy.
Q5. What if we set plans but then they cancel last minute?
Don’t take it personally, things happen! Leave the line of communication open by saying “No worries, hope everything’s okay. Let me know if you want to re-schedule.” The ball’s in their court to follow up in their own time if interest is there.
In Closing
To wrap things up, inviting new acquaintances to hang out doesn’t need to be intimidating if you focus on building comfort through low-key chatting, finding shared interests, keeping invites relaxed, and understanding wherever things go. With patience and a friendly approach, asking someone new to spend casual time together can become a positive experience that deepens an acquaintance into an enjoyable new connection or friendship. Give it a try – you never know what cool people you might meet just from breaking out of your bubble a bit and putting friendship out there for someone new!
